After years of Coaching, I have recognized the distinction between Why someone starts and exercise plan and why someone continues long term. In actuality it doesn't require the perfect program, or best nutrition plan (although those are important), all that is required is clarity and alignment in 2 separate stages.
At first, I listen to Why they showed up for their first visit. What is it they want to change, more importantly WHY they want to change. The truth is there are only a few things that cause everyone to move into a place of discomfort and uncertainty. Most that don't exercise regularly assume starting a new plan is going to be painful, embarrassing, stinky, expensive and possibly a waste of time. So - how do you get past that?
We'll, there are only 2 reason's Why someone will embark on a new fitness or nutrition regime:
1. There current state is too painful to continue
Examples: Seeing a picture of yourself on vacation or a friend has a heart attack and you think that could be you.
2. They have a belief that exercise will give them something they are striving for.
Examples: Feel a sense of accomplishment or Love the way they feel when they are in great shape.
Now WHY does one stay on track with this new program after a few weeks... That's the even bigger question...
I've met people with the most compelling start up goals, those with incredible will power, and commitment - only to give up after a few weeks of putting it all out there. Here's Why...
There are 4 reasons Why we don't stay the course:
1. The pain has reduced (we're not at a place we can't stand anymore), so the motivation is weak - and yet we have not yet reached the place of results - so we haven't experienced the pleasure of our hard work. Translation - weak motivation, no inspiration = you slip, take a break, fall off the wagon.
2. The mood or attitude that you're commonly in. Have you ever noticed happy people are often happy, sad people can get sad regularly. If you live in a common emotion that doesn't make you feel great, your going to choose lifestyle choices that feed that emotion - and not the emotion of empowerment, and fun. It's really challenging to go for a run when your depressed, and stick to your healthy diet when you are down in the dumps. Translation - choosing your moods (yes you have control of this) will dictate the choices you make and the success of your intentions long term
3. Beliefs are one of the most powerful drawbacks for people because they are often unconscious. If you believe people that are fit are vain, shallow, or stupid you will never be fit. Asking great questions allows you to discover your limiting beliefs. Ask yourself: If you where in the best shape of your life: What would people think of you? Who would you need to be? What would need to happen? What am I willing to do to make this happen? What am I willing to no longer do?
4. Rituals/Habits - unconscious patterns like brushing your teeth, turning on the tv, or making coffee are rituals you do with very little thought. Of course there is the thought that you need to do it - but it usually stops there. There is no question about it - why you should or shouldn't, no contemplation, no avoidance - no will power required. It's just what you do. When patterns of ideal eating and exercise fall into this category your set! Research shows people who exercises consistently for a minimum of 6 months will continue to exercise regularly for the rest of there life!
5. You have to Feel Good because of this change. According to human needs psychology if at least 3 of your 6 human needs are being met you will become addicted to an activity or behavior. This means your workout needs to make you feel important, there needs to be variety, you need to have familiarity, feel a connection with yourself or others, feel like your growing or progressing, and feel like you're efforts are contributing to others. If all of these needs are being met - your probably working in the field! Bottom Line: You must find certainty, variety, significance and connection in your workouts. When you feel growth and contribution you'll never let it go. One last point: If your workouts conflict with your 6 human needs, even the best intentions will be squashed. If your a mom who is getting there needs met by there kids at higher levels than there workout - and the workout conflicts with family time, the kids will come first. Translation: Find ways to get your workouts to align with your needs through the right time, intensity, environment, and relationships. Search out the perfect gym, home program, video, or sport to keep you going.
Why aren't you achieving your fitness goals yet?
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Sunday, November 20, 2011
One Step at a Time
I recently ran a workshop on hormones and health that got me thinking about just how long one step at a time really means.
We where discussing the connection between grains and there effect on insulin, and how they effect the entire hormone system and your weight. The objections from the group and the level of frustration I had heard before...in myself. It was at that point I realized how far I had come, and how my journey to wellness has been a lifetime of learning. As I reflect, I realize how I have grown, why I can relate to others, and how I stay passionate about continuing to improve my health and the health of others around me. Here are the highlights...
At 11 years old, I went on a diet. I had been over eating for at least a year, and put on a lot of weight. My Nona thought my chubby cheeks where cute. I deep down, knew I was eating my fear. We had moved to 3 different cities this year, and at the current location, we where being evicted. At times we ate from the food bank, other times the food was very poor quality. I took refuge in guidance counselors, searching for sanity. I don't remember who it was that encouraged me but the message was "when things where difficult, first take care of yourself."
When times got tough, I'd lock myself in the bathroom and brush my hair. It calmed me - and so began the life long belief that self care was fundamental to my survival.
The next step was to sneak out of bed at 5:30 every morning to do the 20 minute workout. I shared a bedroom with my brother and was embarrassed to let anyone know that I knew I was fat. I would get up, workout, then go back to bed and pretend I hadn't been up at all. I lost weight, and tasted success, but home life was still very stressful.
These next few years where the most challenging of my youth. My mom left my step dad, and found a new boyfriend and we blended the families in one household and my dad married his high school sweetheart, who also had a family of her own. The family dynamics combined with drugs, alcohol, high school, and a lack of money challenged me to take care of my self in new ways. I began experimenting with jogging, bike riding, and aerobics classes. Anything that would clear my head and ground me again. I began to feel the happy hormone shifts from exercise and used high intensity cardio to fuel the outlet. Working out kept me sane.
In the later years of high school, this intensity began to take it's toll. My occasional back pain became chronic, and my foot, and knee problems escalated. Physio or orthodics where out of the question - we could not afford that. It was during this time that my interest in biomechanics began. I developed a keen interest in understanding how the body worked and how to bring it back into balance.
I went out on a limb and took a Fitness & Lifestyle management program at George Brown. I felt like the awkward, uncoordinated, over weight girl in the class. I loved moving, but disliked my body. Most of all, I yearned to find a place where "broken" girls like me could go to be supported and educated to find the true meaning of health.
Just as my "career" as an aerobics instructor peaked, so did my foot problems. I was told I needed surgery on both feet. Likely 3 months a foot, and I'd never be able to jump or run again. With seemingly few options open, and a stubborn streak, I opted for self care once again. I discovered pilates, and used it to understand movement on an even deeper level. My 10 year back pain was healing, and so where my feet.
As part of my recovery I was drawn to yoga for it's flexibility benefits. The idea of a mind/body connection while working out was a little too out there for me, at least at first. I listened with a open but skeptical mind, with no intentions of discovering the inner me... I knew who I was. But like water hitting a stone, eventually it wore me down enough that I began to notice that self care was not just about my physical health, it was also about my mental/emotional health. As I opened up to these ideas, I watched myself develop internal strength, as stronger sense of independence, and finally a love for myself that had never been there before.
It was this stage that was so important in my "Personal Training Career". I no longer believed that the best education made the best trainer. (Don't get me wrong, education is important), but if you can't inspire another to develop a love of self care like I had (conscious or unconscious), no amount of education will help them. As I embraced this fact, my personal training results improved. My business grew and I opened Serenity Valley.
Serenity Valley was my dream. The place where you could come for support, encouragement, and education. A place that felt nurturing, and inspired the love of self care in it's members. I had achieved a huge goal and it felt great. And the clients came.
They came with there issues, big and small, chronic pain, life threatening disease, workaholics, alcoholics, and a wide range of people feeling very dissatisfied with there lives. My Lifestyle management diploma was now not enough, so I went back to school. During the first year of my daughters life, with the help of a nanny and supportive husband, I studied to become a Life Coach in between clients. Coaching was the key. Breaking through and seeing people begin to embrace self care the way I had fundamentally embraced 15 years prior.
Unexpectedly, I began to see myself and my life from a deeper perspective. Loving who I really was, and standing up inside myself to embrace the courage to strive bigger, to celebrate my successes, and to hold myself accountable for the life I was living. I began to see my life's passion fulfilled both my personal needs, but also those who I worked to support. I now understood the fuel for this crazy obsession I had and I embraced it whole heartedly, sharing all of me to help others grow too.
Hiring a nutritionist at Serenity Valley was a pivotal point in my eating career. I was embarrassed to share what I ate - especially because I knew better. Well, actually I thought my diet was fairly good, until I began to learn what the meaning of healthy was. I decided I'd learn to cook, mostly with the intent to cook healthy, and experiment with health foods until I found ones that my family and I wound enjoy. (I'm still working on this one...)
As time went on, my business grew, and pressures to be a great mom, wife, and teacher began to wear on me. Self care dropped on the list. Eventually, it caught up to me. We fell into a very stressful time, where money, family, and legal issues boiled over. Comfort foods I grew up on became common. Sugar, coffee, late night eating, or sometimes too stressed to eat at all, where normal. Over the years, I had always embraced movement, breathing, coaching and therapy as self care, but good nutrition was not really a big part of it. Eating what you love was my view of self care, especially in stressful times. And for what ever reason, my cooking goals turned to baking.
Soon I developed hives. They just wouldn't go away no matter what I tried. I had been investigating some health symptoms like acne, fatigue, weight gain, and irritability for at least a year before my hives began, and experimented with a few elimination diets to see if things would improve. I knew there was a problem with hormones and a mineral deficiency, but that was common in my family and there where no real cause for concern from my doctors perspective. When the hives developed, I had no choice but to get to the bottom of it.
It's really amazing what you can accomplish when your itchy all the time. What your willing to do to feel better doesn't seem to have limits... I went to doctors, naturopaths, Chinese medicine men, allergists, an endocrinologist, skin specialist, a homeopath, and even a few pshycic's to figure out what was really going on. I continued to experiment with detox's, medications, and supplements, with periods of remission followed by a full flair up again.
I became obsessed and read everything I could regarding nutrition and hormones. I soon learned there was a certain connection between stress, fatigue, hives and all my other symptoms I had been experiencing over the past few years... my nutrition. (even though I searched for alternative answers...)
Through my latest BioSignature certification, I've learned that my hormone imbalances and hives are a result of years of stress, malnutrition, and poor digestion. A part of me feels like I'm starting from scratch, studying nutrition, hormones and the systems of the body again, on a forensics level. And yet another part realizes it's taken me 25 years to change my diet to one for self care, support and love. A big step in anyone's process of personal growth.
If you are trying to make changes in your diet, know that it's a process. There is a strong emotional connection we all have to food, that's rooted in our childhood, and our choices are often unconscious.
If your serious about making a change, consider the following...
First, decide you will change your diet for good (not for a few months).
Next, know that you have control over everything you put in your mouth.
Third, get educated. Find a resource for nutrition information, and vow to take in new info at least once a week.
And finally, Learn to cook. Trying new things (even just once a week), can make big changes over the long run.
And remember, eating well is one of the most important ways of nourishing your body. Cooking good food is an act of both self care, and an offering for those you love. We all have times where eating what we should isn't always possible, but putting in a little effort consistently will reap rewards. And the best part is, you'll be able to look back over the years and realize just how far you have come on this journey.
For more information on how to get started on improving your digestion, nutrition, fitness or hormone balance visit www.serenityvalley.ca
We where discussing the connection between grains and there effect on insulin, and how they effect the entire hormone system and your weight. The objections from the group and the level of frustration I had heard before...in myself. It was at that point I realized how far I had come, and how my journey to wellness has been a lifetime of learning. As I reflect, I realize how I have grown, why I can relate to others, and how I stay passionate about continuing to improve my health and the health of others around me. Here are the highlights...
At 11 years old, I went on a diet. I had been over eating for at least a year, and put on a lot of weight. My Nona thought my chubby cheeks where cute. I deep down, knew I was eating my fear. We had moved to 3 different cities this year, and at the current location, we where being evicted. At times we ate from the food bank, other times the food was very poor quality. I took refuge in guidance counselors, searching for sanity. I don't remember who it was that encouraged me but the message was "when things where difficult, first take care of yourself."
When times got tough, I'd lock myself in the bathroom and brush my hair. It calmed me - and so began the life long belief that self care was fundamental to my survival.
The next step was to sneak out of bed at 5:30 every morning to do the 20 minute workout. I shared a bedroom with my brother and was embarrassed to let anyone know that I knew I was fat. I would get up, workout, then go back to bed and pretend I hadn't been up at all. I lost weight, and tasted success, but home life was still very stressful.
These next few years where the most challenging of my youth. My mom left my step dad, and found a new boyfriend and we blended the families in one household and my dad married his high school sweetheart, who also had a family of her own. The family dynamics combined with drugs, alcohol, high school, and a lack of money challenged me to take care of my self in new ways. I began experimenting with jogging, bike riding, and aerobics classes. Anything that would clear my head and ground me again. I began to feel the happy hormone shifts from exercise and used high intensity cardio to fuel the outlet. Working out kept me sane.
In the later years of high school, this intensity began to take it's toll. My occasional back pain became chronic, and my foot, and knee problems escalated. Physio or orthodics where out of the question - we could not afford that. It was during this time that my interest in biomechanics began. I developed a keen interest in understanding how the body worked and how to bring it back into balance.
I went out on a limb and took a Fitness & Lifestyle management program at George Brown. I felt like the awkward, uncoordinated, over weight girl in the class. I loved moving, but disliked my body. Most of all, I yearned to find a place where "broken" girls like me could go to be supported and educated to find the true meaning of health.
Just as my "career" as an aerobics instructor peaked, so did my foot problems. I was told I needed surgery on both feet. Likely 3 months a foot, and I'd never be able to jump or run again. With seemingly few options open, and a stubborn streak, I opted for self care once again. I discovered pilates, and used it to understand movement on an even deeper level. My 10 year back pain was healing, and so where my feet.
As part of my recovery I was drawn to yoga for it's flexibility benefits. The idea of a mind/body connection while working out was a little too out there for me, at least at first. I listened with a open but skeptical mind, with no intentions of discovering the inner me... I knew who I was. But like water hitting a stone, eventually it wore me down enough that I began to notice that self care was not just about my physical health, it was also about my mental/emotional health. As I opened up to these ideas, I watched myself develop internal strength, as stronger sense of independence, and finally a love for myself that had never been there before.
It was this stage that was so important in my "Personal Training Career". I no longer believed that the best education made the best trainer. (Don't get me wrong, education is important), but if you can't inspire another to develop a love of self care like I had (conscious or unconscious), no amount of education will help them. As I embraced this fact, my personal training results improved. My business grew and I opened Serenity Valley.
Serenity Valley was my dream. The place where you could come for support, encouragement, and education. A place that felt nurturing, and inspired the love of self care in it's members. I had achieved a huge goal and it felt great. And the clients came.
They came with there issues, big and small, chronic pain, life threatening disease, workaholics, alcoholics, and a wide range of people feeling very dissatisfied with there lives. My Lifestyle management diploma was now not enough, so I went back to school. During the first year of my daughters life, with the help of a nanny and supportive husband, I studied to become a Life Coach in between clients. Coaching was the key. Breaking through and seeing people begin to embrace self care the way I had fundamentally embraced 15 years prior.
Unexpectedly, I began to see myself and my life from a deeper perspective. Loving who I really was, and standing up inside myself to embrace the courage to strive bigger, to celebrate my successes, and to hold myself accountable for the life I was living. I began to see my life's passion fulfilled both my personal needs, but also those who I worked to support. I now understood the fuel for this crazy obsession I had and I embraced it whole heartedly, sharing all of me to help others grow too.
Hiring a nutritionist at Serenity Valley was a pivotal point in my eating career. I was embarrassed to share what I ate - especially because I knew better. Well, actually I thought my diet was fairly good, until I began to learn what the meaning of healthy was. I decided I'd learn to cook, mostly with the intent to cook healthy, and experiment with health foods until I found ones that my family and I wound enjoy. (I'm still working on this one...)
As time went on, my business grew, and pressures to be a great mom, wife, and teacher began to wear on me. Self care dropped on the list. Eventually, it caught up to me. We fell into a very stressful time, where money, family, and legal issues boiled over. Comfort foods I grew up on became common. Sugar, coffee, late night eating, or sometimes too stressed to eat at all, where normal. Over the years, I had always embraced movement, breathing, coaching and therapy as self care, but good nutrition was not really a big part of it. Eating what you love was my view of self care, especially in stressful times. And for what ever reason, my cooking goals turned to baking.
Soon I developed hives. They just wouldn't go away no matter what I tried. I had been investigating some health symptoms like acne, fatigue, weight gain, and irritability for at least a year before my hives began, and experimented with a few elimination diets to see if things would improve. I knew there was a problem with hormones and a mineral deficiency, but that was common in my family and there where no real cause for concern from my doctors perspective. When the hives developed, I had no choice but to get to the bottom of it.
It's really amazing what you can accomplish when your itchy all the time. What your willing to do to feel better doesn't seem to have limits... I went to doctors, naturopaths, Chinese medicine men, allergists, an endocrinologist, skin specialist, a homeopath, and even a few pshycic's to figure out what was really going on. I continued to experiment with detox's, medications, and supplements, with periods of remission followed by a full flair up again.
I became obsessed and read everything I could regarding nutrition and hormones. I soon learned there was a certain connection between stress, fatigue, hives and all my other symptoms I had been experiencing over the past few years... my nutrition. (even though I searched for alternative answers...)
Through my latest BioSignature certification, I've learned that my hormone imbalances and hives are a result of years of stress, malnutrition, and poor digestion. A part of me feels like I'm starting from scratch, studying nutrition, hormones and the systems of the body again, on a forensics level. And yet another part realizes it's taken me 25 years to change my diet to one for self care, support and love. A big step in anyone's process of personal growth.
If you are trying to make changes in your diet, know that it's a process. There is a strong emotional connection we all have to food, that's rooted in our childhood, and our choices are often unconscious.
If your serious about making a change, consider the following...
First, decide you will change your diet for good (not for a few months).
Next, know that you have control over everything you put in your mouth.
Third, get educated. Find a resource for nutrition information, and vow to take in new info at least once a week.
And finally, Learn to cook. Trying new things (even just once a week), can make big changes over the long run.
And remember, eating well is one of the most important ways of nourishing your body. Cooking good food is an act of both self care, and an offering for those you love. We all have times where eating what we should isn't always possible, but putting in a little effort consistently will reap rewards. And the best part is, you'll be able to look back over the years and realize just how far you have come on this journey.
For more information on how to get started on improving your digestion, nutrition, fitness or hormone balance visit www.serenityvalley.ca
Monday, October 24, 2011
How do I get fit? Where do I start?
After 13 years teaching people how to get fit, it seems that I could be in school full time year after year and still be challenged with "how" to get someone fit. There are many different facets to health that create health that provide for the foundation to truly feel and live healthy.
In all of our lives, when one of the facets of health falls out of balance, our health in all facets starts to deteriorate. As a coach, my job is to assess which facet of your health is the most out of sync, and which is the most reasonable to focus energy on first.
Here are the facets that I think make up a healthy person:
Fitness
Nutrition
Stress
Personal Growth
Sleep
Of course each of these areas could include things like relationships, work/life balance, spiritual devotion, hobbies, family stresses, etc.
If any of these areas becomes a focus for a period of at least 2 weeks a shift to improved health is possible. If the focus lasts at least 1 month, the benefits are much longer lasting, and likely to effect the other areas in your life.
Lets look at Sleep as an example. If you focused on getting more sleep, it's likely your energy would improve giving you more energy to workout, your late night eating would diminish resulting in better nutrition, your morning fatigue would be alleviated and the morning rush would be eased, lowering your overall stress.
Any of these facets provide a similar flowing over effect that transfers the efforts of one into all the others. The hang up happens when one area is focused on as being the magic bullet. "if I just work out, I'll lose the weight". The truth is, without being open to the possibility to changing the others, the results of health will be limited and short lived.
People who live healthy lives with little effort have created habits that feed these facets. When one gets off track, like work stress heats up, they take care to get more sleep, watch what they eat, or burn that stress off in a workout. That's what keeps them healthy over the long haul.
No one is perfect, and no one eats right, sleeps well, manages stress effectively all the time. No one gets there workouts in as much as they hope, or have time to reflect and grow as often as they'd like. But those that are healthy know that when one area is lacking, others can help pull through.
When you are ready to take your health to the next level, changing your lifestyle is about considering all the facets of health, beginning with one area, and allowing the others to naturally improve as the months go on. At some point in the process, you will need to look at each of these areas and make small changes to reap the rewards.
Each area provides for an opportunity to learn more about yourself, and find what health really means to you in that area. Lets take nutrition as an example. Some may find that becoming a vegetarian or vegan is what health really looks like for them, others may find that living a life free of processed food means good nutrition, what ever the fit is for your genes and your attitude, there will be some focus required to sustain this healthy practice. No one way is perfect for everyone because everyone is different.
Where do I start?
Having a look at the list, you can approach change by considering which areas seem to be the easiest to change. Sometimes that appears to be the area in which you feel you have the most control (even though you have control over all of them) or the area that you feel most motivated to change first.
Once you've chosen your facet to focus on, next set out some goals for this area, and get to work making small but effective changes for a month. Consider that with your new energy, or uplifted spirit you put it towards another avenue, building on the momentum. Continue to set goals each month, trying new things (not every plan will be a success), and continue focusing on the idea that small changes in one area, can help to propel you in other areas too.
Self sabotage comes in when you begin to justify a bad choices, often conflicting with one of the facets of health.
I worked out today, so I can have this chocolate sundae
I had a hard day at work so I deserve to stay up late
I don't have time to set goals
Another issue I see, is trying to take on all facets together. I often see someone who is trying to quit smoking, lose weight, eat better, and exercise - and they want to do that all in the same week. It's possible for all to change, but focusing on one and allowing the changes to flow into the other avenues is the most effective and longest lasting.
If your looking at changing your lifestyle, consider the areas you'd like to change. 1. Make a list of all the things you'd like to do to take better care of yourself.
2. Prioritize them into the most important to least important
3. Combine them into 3 distinct goals.
4. Choose one goal to start with, breaking it down into steps.
5. Begin. Commit to 1 month, with the intent to adjust course as needed.
6. Get support if your struggling, or choose another goal to begin. (maybe you bit off more than you could chew at first)
7. After one month, revisit your goals, and add a new goal to the list.
A 90 Day plan could mean 3 facets of your health can be improved significantly.
For more information on goal setting check out one of my other articles for an outline.
In all of our lives, when one of the facets of health falls out of balance, our health in all facets starts to deteriorate. As a coach, my job is to assess which facet of your health is the most out of sync, and which is the most reasonable to focus energy on first.
Here are the facets that I think make up a healthy person:
Fitness
Nutrition
Stress
Personal Growth
Sleep
Of course each of these areas could include things like relationships, work/life balance, spiritual devotion, hobbies, family stresses, etc.
If any of these areas becomes a focus for a period of at least 2 weeks a shift to improved health is possible. If the focus lasts at least 1 month, the benefits are much longer lasting, and likely to effect the other areas in your life.
Lets look at Sleep as an example. If you focused on getting more sleep, it's likely your energy would improve giving you more energy to workout, your late night eating would diminish resulting in better nutrition, your morning fatigue would be alleviated and the morning rush would be eased, lowering your overall stress.
Any of these facets provide a similar flowing over effect that transfers the efforts of one into all the others. The hang up happens when one area is focused on as being the magic bullet. "if I just work out, I'll lose the weight". The truth is, without being open to the possibility to changing the others, the results of health will be limited and short lived.
People who live healthy lives with little effort have created habits that feed these facets. When one gets off track, like work stress heats up, they take care to get more sleep, watch what they eat, or burn that stress off in a workout. That's what keeps them healthy over the long haul.
No one is perfect, and no one eats right, sleeps well, manages stress effectively all the time. No one gets there workouts in as much as they hope, or have time to reflect and grow as often as they'd like. But those that are healthy know that when one area is lacking, others can help pull through.
When you are ready to take your health to the next level, changing your lifestyle is about considering all the facets of health, beginning with one area, and allowing the others to naturally improve as the months go on. At some point in the process, you will need to look at each of these areas and make small changes to reap the rewards.
Each area provides for an opportunity to learn more about yourself, and find what health really means to you in that area. Lets take nutrition as an example. Some may find that becoming a vegetarian or vegan is what health really looks like for them, others may find that living a life free of processed food means good nutrition, what ever the fit is for your genes and your attitude, there will be some focus required to sustain this healthy practice. No one way is perfect for everyone because everyone is different.
Where do I start?
Having a look at the list, you can approach change by considering which areas seem to be the easiest to change. Sometimes that appears to be the area in which you feel you have the most control (even though you have control over all of them) or the area that you feel most motivated to change first.
Once you've chosen your facet to focus on, next set out some goals for this area, and get to work making small but effective changes for a month. Consider that with your new energy, or uplifted spirit you put it towards another avenue, building on the momentum. Continue to set goals each month, trying new things (not every plan will be a success), and continue focusing on the idea that small changes in one area, can help to propel you in other areas too.
Self sabotage comes in when you begin to justify a bad choices, often conflicting with one of the facets of health.
I worked out today, so I can have this chocolate sundae
I had a hard day at work so I deserve to stay up late
I don't have time to set goals
Another issue I see, is trying to take on all facets together. I often see someone who is trying to quit smoking, lose weight, eat better, and exercise - and they want to do that all in the same week. It's possible for all to change, but focusing on one and allowing the changes to flow into the other avenues is the most effective and longest lasting.
If your looking at changing your lifestyle, consider the areas you'd like to change. 1. Make a list of all the things you'd like to do to take better care of yourself.
2. Prioritize them into the most important to least important
3. Combine them into 3 distinct goals.
4. Choose one goal to start with, breaking it down into steps.
5. Begin. Commit to 1 month, with the intent to adjust course as needed.
6. Get support if your struggling, or choose another goal to begin. (maybe you bit off more than you could chew at first)
7. After one month, revisit your goals, and add a new goal to the list.
A 90 Day plan could mean 3 facets of your health can be improved significantly.
For more information on goal setting check out one of my other articles for an outline.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Step by Step Goal Setting Package
In this post, you'll find a collaboration of the most important aspects of goal setting. Anyone who is successful at achieving a goal (health or otherwise), has succeeded because he/she has followed the process below. Some of which happen spontaneously, some consciously and other parts by luck.
Goals are achieved when you:
Begin at the right time
Aline intentions with your values
Obtain enough information for action
Focus on the outcome (or pleasure of the goal)
Create a strong plan
Outline short term goals
Write it all down
Reward themselves
Seek Support & Encouragement
Here is an outline to follow... step by step, to discover the mental journey required to move from contemplation to success. Good Luck. Tell me what you think...
Goal Setting through the Eyes of a Wellness Coach
Top 3 Indicators of Success
What is really important to you right now?
Is this the right time to make a change?
Why must you change now?
I know that within the first 30 seconds of my first meeting with a client if they will succeed or not. I know this because I listen to Why they must change. I listen to what is important to them (values), and listen to what’s going on in there life (is this the right time for a change). And finally, are they looking for quick results, or are they looking for a change in the way they feel, the way their life works, a change in who they really are? And finally, are they willing to devise a clear plan, keep track of there efforts, and follow it closely. Working a plan will always prove results.
It’s exciting to take someone from a place of frustration to a place of fulfillment. You can do it. Just take some time to get clear about where you are and where you want to go. This is a journey of self discovery, and the best part of becoming healthy and happy, from the inside out!
Stages of Change:
1. No Interest in Change:
No interest in changing, no interest in learning about changing, happy with current situation
2. Pre-Contemplating:
Know that changing would be good for them, but believes it would be too difficult/painful to change
3. Information Gathering:
Beginning to realize that maintaining current behavior is not a good idea
4. Realization:
Realization that must change, but unsure how
5. First attempt.
Discovery session about how it feels, and accessing the outcome
6. Action
Developing a new habit - first month of new habits, if success is achieved, if you start to feel good about new changes they likely continue
Maintenance Stage
Making the new behavior a regular part of a daily/weekly program
8. Long Term Growth & Optimal Success
Needs continued support, accountability and personal growth in order to stay on track
Values & Priorities:
Understanding what your values are is a complex part of coaching. (That I recommend everyone have during the initial stages), because it helps to have a coach bring to the surface things that are values, where they came from, how they shape your life, actions and beliefs, and how you work with them to achieve your goals, or re-examine your values.
I’ve included a list values so that you can get clear about what yours are.
Adventure
Beauty
To Catalyze
To Contribute
To Create
To Discover
To Feel
To Lead
Mastery
Pleasure
To Relate
Be Sensitive
Risk
Assist
Minister
to Imagination
Plan
Inspire
Locate
Distinguish
To glow
In touch with
Cause
Govern
Model
Dominate field
Greatest
Excellence
Sensual
Play games
Part of community
Be integrated
Be present
Dare
Experiment
Grace
Loveliness
Taste
Impact
Free others
Influence
Serve
Endow
Grant
To Teach
To Win
Be aware
Devoting
Religious
Educate
Prepare
Explain
Prevail
Acquire
Attract
Be accepting
Holy
Instruct
Edify
Accomplish
Win over
Be awake
Honoring
Energize
Augment
Facilitate
Design
Ingenuity
Build
Learn
Realize
Observe
Emote
To feel good
Sensations
Guide
Arouse
Rule
Expert
Superiority
Best
Have fun
Bliss
Sports
Be connected
To nurture
Be with
Tenderness
Empathize
See
Thrill
Gamble
Exhilaration
Enlighten
Prime
Attain
Triumph
Relate with God
Show compassion
Spiritual
Refinement
Radiance
Move forward
Coach
Stimulate
Improve
Strengthen
Provide
Invent
Originality
Perfect
Detect
Uncover
To experience
Be with
Inspire
Enlist
Persuade
Rule field
Primacy
Outdo
Be amused
Family
Be linked
Touch
Support
Danger
Endeavor
Venture
Elegance
Magnificence
Touch
Spark
Synthesize
Conceive
Assemble
Perceive
Discern
Sense
Energy flow
Influence
Reign
Encourage
Adept
Preeminence
Set standards
Be entertained
To unite
Be bonded
Perceive
Respond
Speculation
Quest
The unknown
Attractiveness Gloriousness
Turn on
Encourage
Alter
Be passionate
Inform
Uplift
Score
Predominate
Foster
(Adapted from the Tru Values List from Coach University 1994)
Circle your top ten values. Then put a star next to your your top 4 values.
Once you narrow them down to your short list, consider the following questions:
1. Where did each of these values come from?
2. What positive experiences did you have where you received love from these values?
3. How have these values shaped your life?
4. What actions do you take because of these values, that are no longer serving you?
Are you living in harmony with these values? If not, what changes need to happen?
In a Journal, write about each value. The more clear you are about who you are, and why you do the things you do, the less likely you’ll fall into Self Sabotage.
Is Now the Best Time for Change?
Wheel of Life Worksheet
Rate each area of your life on a scale of 1 to 10.
Health
Relationships
Career
Hobbies
Family & Friends
Personal Time
Wealth
Spirituality
Next consider each section independently and contemplate what would make that section a 10 out of 10.
Write down a short positive affirmation or goal on a cue card to remind you of your intentions to improve this area of your life. Review your intentions daily in the morning and in the evening.
Pain and Pleasure
Human Behavior is driven by one of 2 things
Avoiding pain
Receiving pleasure
Why do we eat food that is not good for us? Because it’s pleasurable.
Fact: Our need to avoid pain is a bigger motivator then achieving pleasure –its human instinct.
Procrastination creates pain – If we associate pain in taking action, then we often do nothing or continue with our current habits or actions. This can change when not taking action becomes more painful. At this point a person is now motivated to change. An example is a student studying for a test the night before.
Unfortunately we often let life circumstances control our behaviors until we are forced to make a change. How can we take control of our behaviors so we are proactive about making changes and avoiding pain?
We change what we associate pain & pleasure with
Power of Focus Can Change your Behavior
If your thinking about the pleasure of eating something, focused on it, remember how it tastes, the pleasure you get from eating it, you’ll be drawn to it. It will be painful to avoid it!
What is your association to changing your diet, eating healthy, or beginning an exercise program? Have you associated pain or discomfort with these changes? When you associate making changes with pain, you’ll feel like your climbing up hill, hit a brick wall and fall off the wagon.
Studies show that for every change we want to make we must be clear about the pleasure we will receive from the actions we put forth, and we must also consider the pain we expect to encounter if we don’t change. Focusing on both creates a strong sense of pleasure and pain in the brain that keeps us inspired to take our intended actions.
In order to do this, you must be clear about how you feel about each short and long term goals actions.
Strategies/Examples for Short Term Goals:
1. What is the pain you will feel for eating something you vowed not to eat
What pleasure will you receive from completing a week on track.
Strategies for Long Term Goals:
1. Get clear about your Goals and Actions.
2. What is the pain that you have associated with this that has prevented you from achieving it in the past.
3. Write all the pleasure you’ve gotten from not following through
4. What will this cost you if you don’t follow through? How does that make you feel?
5. What are all the things you will gain from completing this goal? Present & long term. Make a long list.
Write these down, keep them close, read them several times a day, and in places where food is.
When you get your focus in the right place, be conscious of the pleasure/pain dynamic, you will have the power to change your behavior on anything you want to change, and follow through on any goal.
The Goal Setting Journey
1. In the following space, write down all the fitness goals you would like to achieve. This is your personal fitness wish list. Write down anything you have ever thought of achieving with regards to your health and fitness. Which health and fitness goals, if achieved, would make this year amazing? i.e. Hike grand canyon, run marathon, lose 10 lbs….
2. Review your wish list above and number them from most important to less important.
3. Outline the activities you want to do regularly to take care of yourself.
Lets combine your lists and set goals for a Wellness Plan. By combining the above, what are your Top 3 Goals:
1.
2.
3.
SMART Goals
Choose one of the above goals to be your most important Long Term Goal. Something that will take at least a few months to complete. You can choose either the most pressing or the easiest to achieve, which ever will motivate you on the long term. Can you make your goal all of the following?
Specific:
Measurable:
(weight in lbs, measurements, events, time to complete activity, pictures, clothes sizes, etc.)
Realistic:
(Have you been this fit before? Is your time line realistic? Do you have time for this level of commitment?)
Time Oriented:
(How much time each day/week, how much time will it take to reach your goal)
How will you know when you have reached your goal?
Pleasure
Write down all the pleasure you associate with achieving your goals. (For example, I’ll be able to wear whatever I want. My energy level will improve. My blood pressure will drop. I’ll feel more self-confident.”)
Pain
In contrast, devise a list of painful consequences if you don’t follow your program.
List the Obstacles that may prevent you from your goal.
1.
2.
3.
List Solutions to overcome these perceived obstacles.
1.
2.
3.
Who is your support system? Who will you tell your goals to? (i.e. family, friends, health professionals, etc.)
_______________________________________________________________________________________
Who will you ask to hold you accountable or to check in with you to keep you on track?
_______________________________________________________________________________________
Make a list of 15 things that make you happy, things you love to do, experience, and see.
Action Steps
Now take a moment to list all the action steps required to accomplish your goal.
Short Term Goals
The your Action Steps list has become your short term goals. Each week an action can be taken to move you closer to achieving your big goal. Take a moment to determine which 4 steps you will strive to achieve for the next 4 weeks. Then determine a reward for achieving each of these goals. Choose rewards from your list of things you love. Make sure your rewards don’t defeat your goals.
Week Action Reward
Week 1:
Week 2:
Week 3:
Week 4:
What is your reward for sticking to your plan for the full 4 weeks?
______________________________________________________________________________________
Check Lists
Creating a weekly check list is a great way to keep track of your daily intentions, and added mini goals each day.
Below is an example of a simple check list you can complete each day in your journal, on a sticky, or an iphone.
Take Vitamins morning
Met my protein goal
Drank 8 glasses of water
No sugar today
No eating after 7pm
Worked out today
Went to bed at 10:30
Other:
Notes:
Weekly Review
This Week’s Fitness Goal: ______________________________________________________________________________
This Week’s Nutrition Goal: _____________________________________________________________________________
Outline what you did on each of the following days for your goal
Mon.
Tues.
Wed.
Thurs.
Fri.
Sat.
Sun.
Review your progress this week.
If you have been successful at sticking to your weekly challenge, set a new challenge/goal for next week from your list of habits to change. If you did not complete your goal this week, review your obstacles and solutions, then revamp your goal and increase your reward! If your having trouble – remember nothing ever comes easy when it’s worth it!
Perceived Obstacles Solutions
1
2
3
What did you do this week to improve your fitness?
Did you make conscious healthy nutrition choices this week?
What was your most successful change?
Did you have moments of feeling great about choosing to be healthy this week?
What changes have you noticed in your physical and mental well being this week?
Was you weekly goal and challenging enough, or your reward enticing enough to keep you motivated?
What is your short term goal you plan to achieve next week?
Goals are achieved when you:
Begin at the right time
Aline intentions with your values
Obtain enough information for action
Focus on the outcome (or pleasure of the goal)
Create a strong plan
Outline short term goals
Write it all down
Reward themselves
Seek Support & Encouragement
Here is an outline to follow... step by step, to discover the mental journey required to move from contemplation to success. Good Luck. Tell me what you think...
Goal Setting through the Eyes of a Wellness Coach
Top 3 Indicators of Success
What is really important to you right now?
Is this the right time to make a change?
Why must you change now?
I know that within the first 30 seconds of my first meeting with a client if they will succeed or not. I know this because I listen to Why they must change. I listen to what is important to them (values), and listen to what’s going on in there life (is this the right time for a change). And finally, are they looking for quick results, or are they looking for a change in the way they feel, the way their life works, a change in who they really are? And finally, are they willing to devise a clear plan, keep track of there efforts, and follow it closely. Working a plan will always prove results.
It’s exciting to take someone from a place of frustration to a place of fulfillment. You can do it. Just take some time to get clear about where you are and where you want to go. This is a journey of self discovery, and the best part of becoming healthy and happy, from the inside out!
Stages of Change:
1. No Interest in Change:
No interest in changing, no interest in learning about changing, happy with current situation
2. Pre-Contemplating:
Know that changing would be good for them, but believes it would be too difficult/painful to change
3. Information Gathering:
Beginning to realize that maintaining current behavior is not a good idea
4. Realization:
Realization that must change, but unsure how
5. First attempt.
Discovery session about how it feels, and accessing the outcome
6. Action
Developing a new habit - first month of new habits, if success is achieved, if you start to feel good about new changes they likely continue
Maintenance Stage
Making the new behavior a regular part of a daily/weekly program
8. Long Term Growth & Optimal Success
Needs continued support, accountability and personal growth in order to stay on track
Values & Priorities:
Understanding what your values are is a complex part of coaching. (That I recommend everyone have during the initial stages), because it helps to have a coach bring to the surface things that are values, where they came from, how they shape your life, actions and beliefs, and how you work with them to achieve your goals, or re-examine your values.
I’ve included a list values so that you can get clear about what yours are.
Adventure
Beauty
To Catalyze
To Contribute
To Create
To Discover
To Feel
To Lead
Mastery
Pleasure
To Relate
Be Sensitive
Risk
Assist
Minister
to Imagination
Plan
Inspire
Locate
Distinguish
To glow
In touch with
Cause
Govern
Model
Dominate field
Greatest
Excellence
Sensual
Play games
Part of community
Be integrated
Be present
Dare
Experiment
Grace
Loveliness
Taste
Impact
Free others
Influence
Serve
Endow
Grant
To Teach
To Win
Be aware
Devoting
Religious
Educate
Prepare
Explain
Prevail
Acquire
Attract
Be accepting
Holy
Instruct
Edify
Accomplish
Win over
Be awake
Honoring
Energize
Augment
Facilitate
Design
Ingenuity
Build
Learn
Realize
Observe
Emote
To feel good
Sensations
Guide
Arouse
Rule
Expert
Superiority
Best
Have fun
Bliss
Sports
Be connected
To nurture
Be with
Tenderness
Empathize
See
Thrill
Gamble
Exhilaration
Enlighten
Prime
Attain
Triumph
Relate with God
Show compassion
Spiritual
Refinement
Radiance
Move forward
Coach
Stimulate
Improve
Strengthen
Provide
Invent
Originality
Perfect
Detect
Uncover
To experience
Be with
Inspire
Enlist
Persuade
Rule field
Primacy
Outdo
Be amused
Family
Be linked
Touch
Support
Danger
Endeavor
Venture
Elegance
Magnificence
Touch
Spark
Synthesize
Conceive
Assemble
Perceive
Discern
Sense
Energy flow
Influence
Reign
Encourage
Adept
Preeminence
Set standards
Be entertained
To unite
Be bonded
Perceive
Respond
Speculation
Quest
The unknown
Attractiveness Gloriousness
Turn on
Encourage
Alter
Be passionate
Inform
Uplift
Score
Predominate
Foster
(Adapted from the Tru Values List from Coach University 1994)
Circle your top ten values. Then put a star next to your your top 4 values.
Once you narrow them down to your short list, consider the following questions:
1. Where did each of these values come from?
2. What positive experiences did you have where you received love from these values?
3. How have these values shaped your life?
4. What actions do you take because of these values, that are no longer serving you?
Are you living in harmony with these values? If not, what changes need to happen?
In a Journal, write about each value. The more clear you are about who you are, and why you do the things you do, the less likely you’ll fall into Self Sabotage.
Is Now the Best Time for Change?
Wheel of Life Worksheet
Rate each area of your life on a scale of 1 to 10.
Health
Relationships
Career
Hobbies
Family & Friends
Personal Time
Wealth
Spirituality
Next consider each section independently and contemplate what would make that section a 10 out of 10.
Write down a short positive affirmation or goal on a cue card to remind you of your intentions to improve this area of your life. Review your intentions daily in the morning and in the evening.
Pain and Pleasure
Human Behavior is driven by one of 2 things
Avoiding pain
Receiving pleasure
Why do we eat food that is not good for us? Because it’s pleasurable.
Fact: Our need to avoid pain is a bigger motivator then achieving pleasure –its human instinct.
Procrastination creates pain – If we associate pain in taking action, then we often do nothing or continue with our current habits or actions. This can change when not taking action becomes more painful. At this point a person is now motivated to change. An example is a student studying for a test the night before.
Unfortunately we often let life circumstances control our behaviors until we are forced to make a change. How can we take control of our behaviors so we are proactive about making changes and avoiding pain?
We change what we associate pain & pleasure with
Power of Focus Can Change your Behavior
If your thinking about the pleasure of eating something, focused on it, remember how it tastes, the pleasure you get from eating it, you’ll be drawn to it. It will be painful to avoid it!
What is your association to changing your diet, eating healthy, or beginning an exercise program? Have you associated pain or discomfort with these changes? When you associate making changes with pain, you’ll feel like your climbing up hill, hit a brick wall and fall off the wagon.
Studies show that for every change we want to make we must be clear about the pleasure we will receive from the actions we put forth, and we must also consider the pain we expect to encounter if we don’t change. Focusing on both creates a strong sense of pleasure and pain in the brain that keeps us inspired to take our intended actions.
In order to do this, you must be clear about how you feel about each short and long term goals actions.
Strategies/Examples for Short Term Goals:
1. What is the pain you will feel for eating something you vowed not to eat
What pleasure will you receive from completing a week on track.
Strategies for Long Term Goals:
1. Get clear about your Goals and Actions.
2. What is the pain that you have associated with this that has prevented you from achieving it in the past.
3. Write all the pleasure you’ve gotten from not following through
4. What will this cost you if you don’t follow through? How does that make you feel?
5. What are all the things you will gain from completing this goal? Present & long term. Make a long list.
Write these down, keep them close, read them several times a day, and in places where food is.
When you get your focus in the right place, be conscious of the pleasure/pain dynamic, you will have the power to change your behavior on anything you want to change, and follow through on any goal.
The Goal Setting Journey
1. In the following space, write down all the fitness goals you would like to achieve. This is your personal fitness wish list. Write down anything you have ever thought of achieving with regards to your health and fitness. Which health and fitness goals, if achieved, would make this year amazing? i.e. Hike grand canyon, run marathon, lose 10 lbs….
2. Review your wish list above and number them from most important to less important.
3. Outline the activities you want to do regularly to take care of yourself.
Lets combine your lists and set goals for a Wellness Plan. By combining the above, what are your Top 3 Goals:
1.
2.
3.
SMART Goals
Choose one of the above goals to be your most important Long Term Goal. Something that will take at least a few months to complete. You can choose either the most pressing or the easiest to achieve, which ever will motivate you on the long term. Can you make your goal all of the following?
Specific:
Measurable:
(weight in lbs, measurements, events, time to complete activity, pictures, clothes sizes, etc.)
Realistic:
(Have you been this fit before? Is your time line realistic? Do you have time for this level of commitment?)
Time Oriented:
(How much time each day/week, how much time will it take to reach your goal)
How will you know when you have reached your goal?
Pleasure
Write down all the pleasure you associate with achieving your goals. (For example, I’ll be able to wear whatever I want. My energy level will improve. My blood pressure will drop. I’ll feel more self-confident.”)
Pain
In contrast, devise a list of painful consequences if you don’t follow your program.
List the Obstacles that may prevent you from your goal.
1.
2.
3.
List Solutions to overcome these perceived obstacles.
1.
2.
3.
Who is your support system? Who will you tell your goals to? (i.e. family, friends, health professionals, etc.)
_______________________________________________________________________________________
Who will you ask to hold you accountable or to check in with you to keep you on track?
_______________________________________________________________________________________
Make a list of 15 things that make you happy, things you love to do, experience, and see.
Action Steps
Now take a moment to list all the action steps required to accomplish your goal.
Short Term Goals
The your Action Steps list has become your short term goals. Each week an action can be taken to move you closer to achieving your big goal. Take a moment to determine which 4 steps you will strive to achieve for the next 4 weeks. Then determine a reward for achieving each of these goals. Choose rewards from your list of things you love. Make sure your rewards don’t defeat your goals.
Week Action Reward
Week 1:
Week 2:
Week 3:
Week 4:
What is your reward for sticking to your plan for the full 4 weeks?
______________________________________________________________________________________
Check Lists
Creating a weekly check list is a great way to keep track of your daily intentions, and added mini goals each day.
Below is an example of a simple check list you can complete each day in your journal, on a sticky, or an iphone.
Take Vitamins morning
Met my protein goal
Drank 8 glasses of water
No sugar today
No eating after 7pm
Worked out today
Went to bed at 10:30
Other:
Notes:
Weekly Review
This Week’s Fitness Goal: ______________________________________________________________________________
This Week’s Nutrition Goal: _____________________________________________________________________________
Outline what you did on each of the following days for your goal
Mon.
Tues.
Wed.
Thurs.
Fri.
Sat.
Sun.
Review your progress this week.
If you have been successful at sticking to your weekly challenge, set a new challenge/goal for next week from your list of habits to change. If you did not complete your goal this week, review your obstacles and solutions, then revamp your goal and increase your reward! If your having trouble – remember nothing ever comes easy when it’s worth it!
Perceived Obstacles Solutions
1
2
3
What did you do this week to improve your fitness?
Did you make conscious healthy nutrition choices this week?
What was your most successful change?
Did you have moments of feeling great about choosing to be healthy this week?
What changes have you noticed in your physical and mental well being this week?
Was you weekly goal and challenging enough, or your reward enticing enough to keep you motivated?
What is your short term goal you plan to achieve next week?
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
The Root of Good Intensions
What makes some people achieve there desired wellness goals and and others quit?
For years, I asked myself this question. I’d have some clients come in fully committed and ready to take on what ever program I gave them, and others with the same willingness quit after a few weeks.
What makes one change and the other quit?
I took on this question with more training. Maybe it was the program, and they didn’t feel or see the results quick enough, maybe the program wasn’t appropriate, or I needed more education on injuries and illnesses... what ever it was, I tried to find it.
After 15 years of teaching, I can tell you that lasting change (results) don’t come from a program. Any one will do (well sort of). Any reasonable, well balanced exercise plan and healthy eating plan will work. (The better educated the trainer, the better the results).
Lets look at PX90, or Weight Watchers, or Joining a Gym. Do they work? How many of you have tried one of these? How many have you tried this year? They do work, if you work them. Completing something consistently over a period of at least a month provides some change. Continuing on into the next 2 months allows for a habit to really form, and the mind set to change from a quick fix to a lasting, prolonged behavior that stays with you.
I’ve seen lot of people in the early years, pour out exuberant amounts of energy and will power to lose significant amounts of weight, only to gain it all back after a few months.
What happens? What makes someone change an another stay stuck? Change comes from our readiness & willingness to change. Change for good. I call it the tipping point.
We have all had times in our lives where we reach the tipping point in various situations. It’s when we get fed up, or are deeply hurt, maybe a tragedy has happened to someone you know, or maybe it’s an ah-ha moment. Whatever the situation, there is a point that you decide: I can’t keep doing this. I can’t continue doing what I’m doing.
Pain and Pleasure
Change is best made when someone has reached a point where their is more pain in staying the same, then taking action. This is when people are really motivated. If it’s more uncomfortable to live with yourself the way you are then taking action or doing something different, you will definitely take action.
Taking action is the first step, but this action comes from motivation (not inspiration). Your motivated to change because of the painful consequences of staying the same. This is a great place to start, but won’t get you out of bed for your morning run in a few months time. Without shifting into inspiration, you’ll be yo-yo-ing a gain in no time. So how do we get to leading with Inspiration?
We need to look at the big picture. First off, is this a good time to begin an overall on your lifestyle? Can you make the time in your life to cook, shop, exercise and rest how you will need to in order to follow a program.
Of course my answer is almost always “You don’t have time not to do this!”
But truly, many people try to begin a fitness program when they feel their worst. And they are feeling there worst because they have had a life out of balance. Something has been consuming a lot of time and/or emotional energy. Without addressing this, adding a workout everyday to the to do list, may not make much sense.
Wheel of Life
One of my favorite tools to use when life seems out of balance is one called the Wheel of Life. It’s really quite simple. First take a circle, and split it into a number of pie shapes, with each slice of the pie reflecting a part of your life that is important to you.
My wheel includes a piece of pie for: family, work, finances, spouse, home environment, personal growth, friends, health, and future goals. In each of the pie pieces I rank how I’m feeling, giving each category a rating of 1-10. 10 being that this part of my life is perfect.
We often focus our energy in areas of our life where we have the most amount of pain associated with not spending out energy there. So we spend a lot of hours at work, because if we don’t, we won’t have a pay cheque.
When these areas are out of balance, our wheel doesn’t spin smoothly. Our life becomes a rough ride. So the next step is to find balance in the areas that are the lowest on the list.
Begin with each piece of pie and write what a 10 out of 10 would be (if it where even possible). For example: a 10 out of 10 with my personal growth would mean I did my morning routine of meditation & appreciation everyday, I read something new everyday, I was applying what I have learned, I was taking a class or lesson with someone at least once a week, and had a conference or training coming up in the next few months.
This would be a 10 out of 10 day. Will it happen every day, not likely. But, I’ve become conscious that this part of my life is important, that in order for my life to run smoothly this area needs attention. I’ve identified what success really means, and I will now take action from this place to make change happen.
Action steps may be: sign up for a course, find a new yoga class to attend. Call a friend to join me. Pick up a few new books. Renew my meditation practice with a class, or a guided visualization. Put my journal in a place I will remember to use it.
I don’t have to run out and do all of this at once, nor will I get to a 10 out of 10 right away. If I have expectations of this process being perfect, or an all or nothing plan, I’ll end up right where I started from. Saying I should or I wish I could...
Consider this process with your health & wellness. It’s a process. In the Wheel of Life exercise when you get to your health piece, what looks like a 10 our of 10 for you, may be very different then the person next to you. Yours might be 2 workouts a week, and less sugar. Someone else's may be getting off a pain medication, or lowering their blood pressure. Another may be maintaining a restrictive diet, and working out every day. Keeping your goals in line with your needs and your values can make things stick.
Values
Common situation where I see a client struggle with making changes that conflict with there values is an over giving mom. Her values revolve around family, giving, and doing for others. She can have the best of intentions, but if her workouts or nutrition plans conflict with her families needs, they will be dropped immediately.
Understanding what your values are is a complex part of coaching. (That I recommend everyone have during the initial stages), because it helps to have a coach bring to the surface things that are values, where they came from, how they shape your life, actions and beliefs, and how you work with them to achieve your goals, or re-examine your values and choose to change them.
I’ve included a list values so that you can determine what yours are.
Adventure
Beauty
To Catalyze
To Contribute
To Create
To Discover
To Feel
To Lead
Mastery
Pleasure
To Relate
Be Sensitive
Risk
Assist
Minister
to Imagination
Plan
Inspire
Locate
Distinguish
To glow
In touch with
Cause
Govern
Model
Dominate field
Greatest
Excellence
Sensual
Play games
Part of community
Be integrated
Be present
Dare
Experiment
Grace
Loveliness
Taste
Impact
Free others
Influence
Serve
Endow
Grant
To Teach
To Win
Be aware
Devoting
Religious
Educate
Prepare
Explain
Prevail
Acquire
Attract
Be accepting
Holy
Instruct
Edify
Accomplish
Win over
Be awake
Honoring
Energize
Augment
Facilitate
Design
Ingenuity
Build
Learn
Realize
Observe
Emote
To feel good
Sensations
Guide
Arouse Rule
Expert
Superiority
Best
Have fun
Bliss
Sports
Be connected
To nurture
Be with
Tenderness
Empathize
See
Thrill
Gamble
Exhilaration
Enlighten
Prime
Attain
Triumph
Relate with God
Show compassion
Spiritual
Refinement
Radiance
Move forward
Coach
Stimulate
Improve
Strengthen
Provide
Invent
Originality
Perfect
Detect
Uncover
To experience
Be with
Inspire
Enlist
Persuade
Rule field
Primacy
Outdo
Be amused
Family
Be linked
Touch
Support
Danger
Endeavor
Venture
Elegance
Magnificence
Touch
Spark
Synthesize
Conceive
Assemble
Perceive
Discern
Sense
Energy flow
Influence
Reign
Encour
age
Adept
Preeminence
Set standards
Be entertained
To unite
Be bonded
Perceive
Respond
Speculation
Quest
The unknown
Attractiveness
Gloriousness
Turn on
Encourage
Alter
Be passionate
Inform
Uplift
Score
Predominate
Foster
(Adapted from the Tru Values List from Coach University 1994)
Choose your top ten - words that choose you (not words that you should choose).
Then narrow it down to your top 4 values.
Once you narrow them down to your short list, consider the following questions:
Where do you think these values came from?
What positive experiences did you have where you received love or pleasure from this value?
How have these values shaped your life?
What actions do you take because of these values, that are not serving your higher good?
Are you living in harmony with these values - and if not, what changes need to happen?
Stages of Change
On any topic you can think of, we are in a stage of change. Recognizing the stage your at allows you to identify what is required to move forward, and often why you feel stuck or slip back into old patterns.
No Change:
-No interest in changing, no interest in learning about changing, happy with current situation
Pre-Contemplating:
-Know that changing would be good for them, but believes it would be too difficult/painful to change
Information Gathering:
-beginning to realize that maintaining current behavior is not a good idea
Realization:
Realization that must change, but unsure how
First attempt.
Discovery session about how it feels, and accessing the outcome
Action
Developing a new habit - first month of new habits, if success is achieved, if you start to feel good about new changes they likely continue
Maintenance - making the new behavior a regular part of a daily/weekly program
Long Term Success
- needs continued support, accountability and personal growth in order to stay on track
Conclusion:
I know that within the first 30 seconds of my first meeting with a client if they will succeed or not. I know this because I listen to Why they must change. I listen to what is important to them (values), and listen to what’s going on in there life (is this the right time for a change). And finally, are they looking for quick results, or are they looking for a change in the way they feel, the way their life works, a change in who they really are?
It’s exciting to take someone from a place of frustration to a place of fulfillment. You can do it. Just take some time to get clear about where you are and where you want to go. This is a journey of self discovery, and the best part of becoming healthy and happy, from the inside out!
For years, I asked myself this question. I’d have some clients come in fully committed and ready to take on what ever program I gave them, and others with the same willingness quit after a few weeks.
What makes one change and the other quit?
I took on this question with more training. Maybe it was the program, and they didn’t feel or see the results quick enough, maybe the program wasn’t appropriate, or I needed more education on injuries and illnesses... what ever it was, I tried to find it.
After 15 years of teaching, I can tell you that lasting change (results) don’t come from a program. Any one will do (well sort of). Any reasonable, well balanced exercise plan and healthy eating plan will work. (The better educated the trainer, the better the results).
Lets look at PX90, or Weight Watchers, or Joining a Gym. Do they work? How many of you have tried one of these? How many have you tried this year? They do work, if you work them. Completing something consistently over a period of at least a month provides some change. Continuing on into the next 2 months allows for a habit to really form, and the mind set to change from a quick fix to a lasting, prolonged behavior that stays with you.
I’ve seen lot of people in the early years, pour out exuberant amounts of energy and will power to lose significant amounts of weight, only to gain it all back after a few months.
What happens? What makes someone change an another stay stuck? Change comes from our readiness & willingness to change. Change for good. I call it the tipping point.
We have all had times in our lives where we reach the tipping point in various situations. It’s when we get fed up, or are deeply hurt, maybe a tragedy has happened to someone you know, or maybe it’s an ah-ha moment. Whatever the situation, there is a point that you decide: I can’t keep doing this. I can’t continue doing what I’m doing.
Pain and Pleasure
Change is best made when someone has reached a point where their is more pain in staying the same, then taking action. This is when people are really motivated. If it’s more uncomfortable to live with yourself the way you are then taking action or doing something different, you will definitely take action.
Taking action is the first step, but this action comes from motivation (not inspiration). Your motivated to change because of the painful consequences of staying the same. This is a great place to start, but won’t get you out of bed for your morning run in a few months time. Without shifting into inspiration, you’ll be yo-yo-ing a gain in no time. So how do we get to leading with Inspiration?
We need to look at the big picture. First off, is this a good time to begin an overall on your lifestyle? Can you make the time in your life to cook, shop, exercise and rest how you will need to in order to follow a program.
Of course my answer is almost always “You don’t have time not to do this!”
But truly, many people try to begin a fitness program when they feel their worst. And they are feeling there worst because they have had a life out of balance. Something has been consuming a lot of time and/or emotional energy. Without addressing this, adding a workout everyday to the to do list, may not make much sense.
Wheel of Life
One of my favorite tools to use when life seems out of balance is one called the Wheel of Life. It’s really quite simple. First take a circle, and split it into a number of pie shapes, with each slice of the pie reflecting a part of your life that is important to you.
My wheel includes a piece of pie for: family, work, finances, spouse, home environment, personal growth, friends, health, and future goals. In each of the pie pieces I rank how I’m feeling, giving each category a rating of 1-10. 10 being that this part of my life is perfect.
We often focus our energy in areas of our life where we have the most amount of pain associated with not spending out energy there. So we spend a lot of hours at work, because if we don’t, we won’t have a pay cheque.
When these areas are out of balance, our wheel doesn’t spin smoothly. Our life becomes a rough ride. So the next step is to find balance in the areas that are the lowest on the list.
Begin with each piece of pie and write what a 10 out of 10 would be (if it where even possible). For example: a 10 out of 10 with my personal growth would mean I did my morning routine of meditation & appreciation everyday, I read something new everyday, I was applying what I have learned, I was taking a class or lesson with someone at least once a week, and had a conference or training coming up in the next few months.
This would be a 10 out of 10 day. Will it happen every day, not likely. But, I’ve become conscious that this part of my life is important, that in order for my life to run smoothly this area needs attention. I’ve identified what success really means, and I will now take action from this place to make change happen.
Action steps may be: sign up for a course, find a new yoga class to attend. Call a friend to join me. Pick up a few new books. Renew my meditation practice with a class, or a guided visualization. Put my journal in a place I will remember to use it.
I don’t have to run out and do all of this at once, nor will I get to a 10 out of 10 right away. If I have expectations of this process being perfect, or an all or nothing plan, I’ll end up right where I started from. Saying I should or I wish I could...
Consider this process with your health & wellness. It’s a process. In the Wheel of Life exercise when you get to your health piece, what looks like a 10 our of 10 for you, may be very different then the person next to you. Yours might be 2 workouts a week, and less sugar. Someone else's may be getting off a pain medication, or lowering their blood pressure. Another may be maintaining a restrictive diet, and working out every day. Keeping your goals in line with your needs and your values can make things stick.
Values
Common situation where I see a client struggle with making changes that conflict with there values is an over giving mom. Her values revolve around family, giving, and doing for others. She can have the best of intentions, but if her workouts or nutrition plans conflict with her families needs, they will be dropped immediately.
Understanding what your values are is a complex part of coaching. (That I recommend everyone have during the initial stages), because it helps to have a coach bring to the surface things that are values, where they came from, how they shape your life, actions and beliefs, and how you work with them to achieve your goals, or re-examine your values and choose to change them.
I’ve included a list values so that you can determine what yours are.
Adventure
Beauty
To Catalyze
To Contribute
To Create
To Discover
To Feel
To Lead
Mastery
Pleasure
To Relate
Be Sensitive
Risk
Assist
Minister
to Imagination
Plan
Inspire
Locate
Distinguish
To glow
In touch with
Cause
Govern
Model
Dominate field
Greatest
Excellence
Sensual
Play games
Part of community
Be integrated
Be present
Dare
Experiment
Grace
Loveliness
Taste
Impact
Free others
Influence
Serve
Endow
Grant
To Teach
To Win
Be aware
Devoting
Religious
Educate
Prepare
Explain
Prevail
Acquire
Attract
Be accepting
Holy
Instruct
Edify
Accomplish
Win over
Be awake
Honoring
Energize
Augment
Facilitate
Design
Ingenuity
Build
Learn
Realize
Observe
Emote
To feel good
Sensations
Guide
Arouse Rule
Expert
Superiority
Best
Have fun
Bliss
Sports
Be connected
To nurture
Be with
Tenderness
Empathize
See
Thrill
Gamble
Exhilaration
Enlighten
Prime
Attain
Triumph
Relate with God
Show compassion
Spiritual
Refinement
Radiance
Move forward
Coach
Stimulate
Improve
Strengthen
Provide
Invent
Originality
Perfect
Detect
Uncover
To experience
Be with
Inspire
Enlist
Persuade
Rule field
Primacy
Outdo
Be amused
Family
Be linked
Touch
Support
Danger
Endeavor
Venture
Elegance
Magnificence
Touch
Spark
Synthesize
Conceive
Assemble
Perceive
Discern
Sense
Energy flow
Influence
Reign
Encour
age
Adept
Preeminence
Set standards
Be entertained
To unite
Be bonded
Perceive
Respond
Speculation
Quest
The unknown
Attractiveness
Gloriousness
Turn on
Encourage
Alter
Be passionate
Inform
Uplift
Score
Predominate
Foster
(Adapted from the Tru Values List from Coach University 1994)
Choose your top ten - words that choose you (not words that you should choose).
Then narrow it down to your top 4 values.
Once you narrow them down to your short list, consider the following questions:
Where do you think these values came from?
What positive experiences did you have where you received love or pleasure from this value?
How have these values shaped your life?
What actions do you take because of these values, that are not serving your higher good?
Are you living in harmony with these values - and if not, what changes need to happen?
Stages of Change
On any topic you can think of, we are in a stage of change. Recognizing the stage your at allows you to identify what is required to move forward, and often why you feel stuck or slip back into old patterns.
No Change:
-No interest in changing, no interest in learning about changing, happy with current situation
Pre-Contemplating:
-Know that changing would be good for them, but believes it would be too difficult/painful to change
Information Gathering:
-beginning to realize that maintaining current behavior is not a good idea
Realization:
Realization that must change, but unsure how
First attempt.
Discovery session about how it feels, and accessing the outcome
Action
Developing a new habit - first month of new habits, if success is achieved, if you start to feel good about new changes they likely continue
Maintenance - making the new behavior a regular part of a daily/weekly program
Long Term Success
- needs continued support, accountability and personal growth in order to stay on track
Conclusion:
I know that within the first 30 seconds of my first meeting with a client if they will succeed or not. I know this because I listen to Why they must change. I listen to what is important to them (values), and listen to what’s going on in there life (is this the right time for a change). And finally, are they looking for quick results, or are they looking for a change in the way they feel, the way their life works, a change in who they really are?
It’s exciting to take someone from a place of frustration to a place of fulfillment. You can do it. Just take some time to get clear about where you are and where you want to go. This is a journey of self discovery, and the best part of becoming healthy and happy, from the inside out!
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Somethings Gotta Give
Most of us several times through out the year, come to a place in our lives where things are not working. They haven't been working in a while, but it's finally gotten to a place where you decide "This has got to change!"
This is often where I come in. They've picked up the phone, they've come in for a tour, checked out a class, or maybe even gone as far as booking a personal training session. And a lot of people don't get much further than this.
They connect with me, tell me they are out of shape, in pain, or have really low energy. We both agree that an exercise program will help them achieve what they desire, then after a week or 2 the goal starts to seem unachievable. It's at this point where the coach in me comes out.
Consider your busy day, with all the responsibilities you currently have, and the energy to get it all done, then add another 30 minutes to your day for a workout, and at least that to prepare a healthy dinner. That's an hour a day, times 7 days. Where would you find an additional 7 hours (minimum) in your already busy schedule. It's not there.
Unless you are very committed to this change, there is often a struggle in the first month of any wellness program. Finding the time, when there are so many other things to do (or things you'd rather be doing), is really the hard part.
So before you begin this new endeavor , as a coach, I try to have my clients consider what they are willing to put aside to make this plan a success.
I see moms with good intentions, let hockey and housekeeping, and errands ruin there plans. I see CEO's struggle with business lunches, trips, and early meetings, interfere with there intentions. It's easy to fall off when we don't consider that something's gotta give.
And in the early stages of a wellness program, the body is adjusting, it's tired, and overworked. It will be a few more weeks before the workouts don't hurt, and the energy levels increase.
This is why a coach in those first few weeks can be the best money you ever spend on your health.
I know that a client is going to make it, when they decide that their health comes first. And that despite the responsibilities they have in there life, this is important. When they sit down and think about how they have been living there life, and contemplates how they need to adjust that to make a wellness program a part of there whole life - I know the solutions will surface. If a meeting comes up, or a soccer practice gets in the way of their workouts, they find a way to fit it in. And it's not because they love it, or are so committed. It's often because they have stopped to consider the obstacles and a plan B for these interruptions. They put their health first and made the time, and something else went undone.
If your willing to consider that you'll have to say no, that you may not stay up and watch the evening news, you may have to order the salad instead, or have the laundry pile up, then you'll be ready to change the way you feel and the way you look. Only then will you have the inspiration and energy you are searching for.
As a side note, sometimes life takes us in different directions. Sometimes there are things that are more important then getting a workout in. A new baby, a sick family member, creating a proposal for a new job, etc. These things are important and often temporary. If they exceed temporary - then you must factor in your health. Sometimes I turn people away, telling them to focus on what's really important, find sleep and good nutrition, and the toned fit body can wait.
And sometimes exercise is exactly what one needs to release the stress of our crazy lives. But, somethings gotta give.
This is often where I come in. They've picked up the phone, they've come in for a tour, checked out a class, or maybe even gone as far as booking a personal training session. And a lot of people don't get much further than this.
They connect with me, tell me they are out of shape, in pain, or have really low energy. We both agree that an exercise program will help them achieve what they desire, then after a week or 2 the goal starts to seem unachievable. It's at this point where the coach in me comes out.
Consider your busy day, with all the responsibilities you currently have, and the energy to get it all done, then add another 30 minutes to your day for a workout, and at least that to prepare a healthy dinner. That's an hour a day, times 7 days. Where would you find an additional 7 hours (minimum) in your already busy schedule. It's not there.
Unless you are very committed to this change, there is often a struggle in the first month of any wellness program. Finding the time, when there are so many other things to do (or things you'd rather be doing), is really the hard part.
So before you begin this new endeavor , as a coach, I try to have my clients consider what they are willing to put aside to make this plan a success.
I see moms with good intentions, let hockey and housekeeping, and errands ruin there plans. I see CEO's struggle with business lunches, trips, and early meetings, interfere with there intentions. It's easy to fall off when we don't consider that something's gotta give.
And in the early stages of a wellness program, the body is adjusting, it's tired, and overworked. It will be a few more weeks before the workouts don't hurt, and the energy levels increase.
This is why a coach in those first few weeks can be the best money you ever spend on your health.
I know that a client is going to make it, when they decide that their health comes first. And that despite the responsibilities they have in there life, this is important. When they sit down and think about how they have been living there life, and contemplates how they need to adjust that to make a wellness program a part of there whole life - I know the solutions will surface. If a meeting comes up, or a soccer practice gets in the way of their workouts, they find a way to fit it in. And it's not because they love it, or are so committed. It's often because they have stopped to consider the obstacles and a plan B for these interruptions. They put their health first and made the time, and something else went undone.
If your willing to consider that you'll have to say no, that you may not stay up and watch the evening news, you may have to order the salad instead, or have the laundry pile up, then you'll be ready to change the way you feel and the way you look. Only then will you have the inspiration and energy you are searching for.
As a side note, sometimes life takes us in different directions. Sometimes there are things that are more important then getting a workout in. A new baby, a sick family member, creating a proposal for a new job, etc. These things are important and often temporary. If they exceed temporary - then you must factor in your health. Sometimes I turn people away, telling them to focus on what's really important, find sleep and good nutrition, and the toned fit body can wait.
And sometimes exercise is exactly what one needs to release the stress of our crazy lives. But, somethings gotta give.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Challenges can make you Stronger
I'm convinced some of the best health professionals are the ones that are the most screwed up. It's true. When you live in a body that has a lot of pain, you have no choice but to pay attention and seek help. Along the way you learn a lot about how a body is in balance, and how it feels to be so far from it. Usually through trial and error with health care specialists, a lot of money on supplements, several trips to chapters, and many late night Google searches, things start to come together. Sharing this knowledge not only helps us grow and understand it for ourselves, but allows us the opportunity to help others who may be struggling with similar symptoms or pain.
So, when ever I have issues in my body, I learn as much as I can and am very eager to share what I've learned. In my late teens and early twenties I had chronic foot, knee, and back pain. Over that decade I studied anatomy, biomechanics, Pilates and yoga. Through this knowledge, I avoided surgery and went on to run triathlons and adventure races. Today, I'm confident that I can help just about anyone return to a pain free state if they are suffering from body pain related to there physical anatomy.
Now another decade later, I'm learning a lot more about nutrition and it's relationship to hormones and allergies. Last year, after a few months of intense stress, I broke out in hives. They lasted about 5 months on a daily basis, with some random relief. I saw every kind of doctor you can imagine, both natural, Chinese, specialists, and traditional. I went to just about anyone claiming to be able to help me. I tried lots of supplements, creams, detoxes, drops, meditation, retreats and even prayer. I read more books this past year then I've read my whole life.
The weird thing is now that I've found some relief, I can appreciate the process and share my knowledge with those seeking solutions. There is something so authentic about helping others when you have experienced their pain too.
So these days, I'm teach people how to find balance not only in there physical anatomy, and in stress management but also in there gut. Learning to eat well to improve the function of there digestion, immune system, and hormone system is a really important component to overall health. And because I've lived through it, I share not only what you should do, but how to realistically make these changes.
Now my favorite topic is food. I love to talk about my organic garden, a healthy recipe discovery, or share research from a new study on minerals. Who would have thought months of agony over hives would have made me a better cook and an avid reader?
If there is something in your life your struggling with, don't be afraid to immerse yourself in it. Not as a victim, but as a discoverer. Consider that this journey may have a purpose. This challenge is an opportunity to learn more about yourself. This challenge offers the chance to experience what it means to be human and create empathy for others. Our challenges connect us, build relationships, and provide meaning and substance to our lives. Don't let your challenges get you down. Use them to make you stronger.
How have you grown as a person from your latest challenge?
Who have you grown closer to as a result of this challenge?
How has your life's challenges improved the lives of others?
Are you ready for your next challenge?
So, when ever I have issues in my body, I learn as much as I can and am very eager to share what I've learned. In my late teens and early twenties I had chronic foot, knee, and back pain. Over that decade I studied anatomy, biomechanics, Pilates and yoga. Through this knowledge, I avoided surgery and went on to run triathlons and adventure races. Today, I'm confident that I can help just about anyone return to a pain free state if they are suffering from body pain related to there physical anatomy.
Now another decade later, I'm learning a lot more about nutrition and it's relationship to hormones and allergies. Last year, after a few months of intense stress, I broke out in hives. They lasted about 5 months on a daily basis, with some random relief. I saw every kind of doctor you can imagine, both natural, Chinese, specialists, and traditional. I went to just about anyone claiming to be able to help me. I tried lots of supplements, creams, detoxes, drops, meditation, retreats and even prayer. I read more books this past year then I've read my whole life.
The weird thing is now that I've found some relief, I can appreciate the process and share my knowledge with those seeking solutions. There is something so authentic about helping others when you have experienced their pain too.
So these days, I'm teach people how to find balance not only in there physical anatomy, and in stress management but also in there gut. Learning to eat well to improve the function of there digestion, immune system, and hormone system is a really important component to overall health. And because I've lived through it, I share not only what you should do, but how to realistically make these changes.
Now my favorite topic is food. I love to talk about my organic garden, a healthy recipe discovery, or share research from a new study on minerals. Who would have thought months of agony over hives would have made me a better cook and an avid reader?
If there is something in your life your struggling with, don't be afraid to immerse yourself in it. Not as a victim, but as a discoverer. Consider that this journey may have a purpose. This challenge is an opportunity to learn more about yourself. This challenge offers the chance to experience what it means to be human and create empathy for others. Our challenges connect us, build relationships, and provide meaning and substance to our lives. Don't let your challenges get you down. Use them to make you stronger.
How have you grown as a person from your latest challenge?
Who have you grown closer to as a result of this challenge?
How has your life's challenges improved the lives of others?
Are you ready for your next challenge?
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